Suicide Squad Film Review

"Suicide Squad: Oh, I'm not gonna kill you... I'm just gonna hurt you really, really bad"

This is going to be shallow and condescending, just like this critical darling film! There was hope that DC would Marvel us with their version of Guardians of the Galaxy, a rag-tag team of anti-heroes coming together for the greater good, however in typical DC fashion they deliver us a horrendously edited final product.

Call me a film snob or DC hater, I don't care this film was garbage from the get-go. There's only so many pop-songs & mini intro's I can handle in the first act, our introduction to the Suicide Squad was basically one long music video with shiny neon lights that would trigger any epileptic into having a frothing at the mouth fit right there in the cinema.

Maybe Warner Bro's don't actually care, maybe they aren't trying to catch up to Marvel, maybe they're just exploiting all the superhero film rights they own to make quick cash & if I was a Warner Bro's shareholder I probably wouldn't care either. This film appeals to the lowest common denominator of film-goers. If you just want action scene after action scene with terrible one liners then this is the film for you.

The premise itself is laughable; let's put together a team of meta-humans to combat the next superman scenario in-case the next Superman to visit earth doesn't "come in peace". It has the exact same overarching plot issue that "Man Of Steel" had. A self full-filling prophecy, if Superman never came to earth in the first place then Superman would never have needed to save us. So what happens in this film? The government, headed by Viola Davis's character "Amanda Waller" try's to employ the "Enchantress" an uncontrollable witch that releases her demonic brother that creates yet again another faceless enemy for our anti-heroes to combat. Just like with The Avengers 1&2 the faceless armies have no real substance because in a PG-13 film god-forbid we kill actual human beings and show blood or have an antagonist with real motivations.

Cara Delevingne plays the Enchantress and Cara Delevingne is to acting what Adam Sandler is to comedy. She's awful and only now has a film career because she's a famous model that has 32 million Instagram followers that the studio hopes to exploit. I could keep on writing about individual performances such as Jared Leto's "Joker" but whats the point? They're all forgettable performances in a film that has no structural integrity because the editing is the worst I've seen all year, probably due to the rumored interference from the studio that supposedly hired last minute editors to do a re-cut of the film because it was originally too dark. So would I recommend Suicide? Yes to anyone who see's this atrocity. 0/5